All is Well

So the FIRST thing I did today was walk, and then drive, all over the new neighborhood while shouting my dog’s name over and over. That was a fun 20 minutes!

Let’s get straight to the happy ending: she was found not 10 yards from our house, sitting in tall weeds, feasting on menudo out of a neighbor’s trash bag (all together now: GROSS!). The menudo was, understandably, much more compelling than my loving voice.

Upon return of said barebutted dog to our house, Cristian vowed before God to never again leave the gate unlatched. I think he means it, so I won’t go into the historical record and mention our many conversations about the wisdom of keeping the trash can just inside the gate and the likelihood that Cristian might forget to close the gate after opening it to take the trash out. But if any of you were looking for solid statistical data on what Cristian is or is not likely to do in a given situation, may I recommend myself as a source?

I get an F

Dr Johnson: So, what brings you in tonight?

Dana: Well, Fluppy started getting itchy about three weeks ago. We’re in the middle of moving, so I thought was anxiety about the new place, so I gave her Benedryl, and it seemed to help, so I thought we might be able to ride it out. But then she kept itching.

Dr. Johnson: She seems to have some fairly large scabs here, around the tail area.

Dana: I know. Those came up about a week ago? But we had some betagen sulfate left over from the last time she had skin allergies, so I just put that on them and kept giving her Benedryl.

Dr. Johnson: And I’m seeing a little flea dirt here…..

Dana: I know! I know. I didn’t see any fleas until last Friday. When I saw a flea, I came right in and got some of those flea killing pills. And I gave her a bath. And I kept giving her Benedryl, because then I was sure we would get it back under control. But then she kept itching.

Dr. Johnson:  Yes, this entire area looks pretty inflamed. Sometimes dogs have an allergic reaction to flea bites.

Dana: I feel so bad. I kept thinking we were turning a corner with her itchyness, and that we could manage it ourselves, but then it just kept getting worse.

Dr. Johnson: I’m also seeing some green paint in her fur here, on her left side.

Dana: Oh my God, really? Oh. My. God. You’re right. How incredibly embarrassing. We’re painting the house, she must have brushed against the wall on our way out? I promise you, she didn’t have that paint on her fur when I got home from work. I would have noticed.

Dr. Johnson: We’ll just take her into the back here and give her a little shave. She’ll have to wear a cone for about a week.

Dana: Ok.

Dr. Johnson:  And she’ll need some antibiotics to prevent those cuts from getting infected.

Dana: Ok.

Dr. Johnson: And some steroids to help with the itching.

Dana: Ok.

Dr. Johnson: And we’ll give you a special wash for her. She’ll need it twice a day, to bring down the inflammation.

Dana: Ok.

Dr. Johnson: And I wonder if you’d be willing to promise to never have children?

 —-

Alright, he didn’t say that. But he COULD have.

Progress Report

+ All of our big furniture got moved this weekend. We are now officially in the new place.

- There are still 876419 boxes in the old apartment.

+ Our new house has rosebushes, and they are blooming. In December.

- Our new house has fire ants, and they are swarming. In the kitchen.

+ Fluppy has adjusted smoothly to the new house.  This is newsworthy because historically, moving put her into a weeks long Woody Allen-like state of neurosis.

- Cristian accidentally broke a glass shade for one of our track lights while trying to change a burned out bulb. Upon going to Lowe’s, we found that these glass shades were sold only as part of an entire, $54.00 track lighting set.

+ A Lowe’s employee who both looked and acted like Santa took a matching glass shade off their display model and gave it to us for free. He then told us to have a “Happy Holiday and an Even Happier New Year!” Will do, Santa Claus Man. Will do.