Nothing I Can Do About it Now

February 27, 2007

Basic Common Sense vs The Great Depression Mentality: Scene 1

Filed under: love — dregina @ 4:00 pm

. 

 

Dana

                  sadly looks down into her coffee mug

I wish we had some cream.

.

.

Cristian

We have cream! What are you talking about?

.

.

Dana

We have cream?

   silently rummages through the fridge. Emerges brandishing a carton of heavy whipping cream

This? You put this in your coffee?

.

.

Cristian

 Ye

          .

.

Dana

 interrupts with a look of horror on her face

Did you see the expiration date on this?  I don’t even remember when I bought this. I think I bought it to make a pie. A pie for Thanksgiving.  You put this in your coffee? Did you even look at it?

.

.

Cristian

 Ye

.

.

Dana

with increasing horror

Oh. My. God. Cristian, it expired in May. May. Jesus Christ, I should have thrown this out months ago.

heads for sink, carton in hand 

.

.

Cristian

stridently

Wait, what are you doing? Don’t pour that down the drain, it’s fine, I’m drinking it, it tastes fine. It’s fine. Don’t waste it. It’s fine. I’ll drink it.

.

.

Dana

with fervor

Are you crazy? Have you completely lost your mind? This is dairy. It expired in May. No one should drink this.  I’m dumping it out.

.

.

Cristian

sadly watches as the cream goes down the drain

.

.

Dana

 struggles not to retch as huge clumps of congealed dairy thud into the sink

Look at that. You were drinking that. Do you feel ok? Because I feel sick.

.

.

Cristian

It was fine.

.

Dana

You are a maniac.

.

.

Cristan

defiantly

I’m still going to finish my coffee.

.

. 

End Scene

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1 Comment »

  1. i think cristian will most assuredly live to tell and retell and potentially pour this digestive dairy debate down your throat.

    i’m surmising that the whipping cream was maybe only used once or twice and that the sebaceous substance in question was in a protective paper carton. (if this is an incorrect assumption i automatically lose 10 points here and dana wins 10, cristian can vie villalobos style for points later if he can prove beyond a reasonable doubt that he even for the nano-ist second considered any of the points i will now attempt to make.)

    due to the high fat content of the HEAVY cream (which may be even more intensely dense than just plain cream and potentially selectively scraped from the inner udder of our bovine beast buddies), and the fact that it was probably rarely opened and also obscured in an opaque container, exposing it to minimal airborne antigens and septic solar rays, the concentration of raucus streptococcus may be minimal.

    that being said, i too would have pitched the cream. (ewww!)

    i tried to do some actual(internet)research about this, but all i could find were many a digest reinacting the same scene you and cristian starred in whereby the male counterpart consumes the coagulated cream, the female reacts with shock, disposes of the danger and the male reacts to her reaction with sadness to the sweet serum being sink spattered. this postulation is sounding more and more pornographic. peace out.

    Comment by p$ — February 28, 2007 @ 10:45 am


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