Nothing I Can Do About it Now

November 29, 2007

I THOUGHT IT WAS A CUP!!!!!

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 3:57 pm

Everything I am about to say is something you already know.

 Moving has been stressful. We’re paying double rent on the new house and my old apartment this month, on top of a big dentist bill and a refrigerator purchase, so money is tight. While it seems like having a whole month to move would reduce stress and pressure, there’s really not much positive about trying to live in two places at once. The new yard needs work and has got some big bald spots. It’s been raining. The dog, therefore, has tracked a metric ton of mud all over the tile.  At least it’s tile, right? We’ve been painting and painting and painting and painting every room in the house, and yet none of them are finished.  1/2 our packages are being sent to one post office for pick-up, and the other 1/2 are going to a different post office. Twice the driving, two times the lines!  I could go on. Every conversation Cristian and I have had for the past three weeks has sounded like:

“We need to do this. But before we do this, we have to do that. But before we can do that, we have to do this other thing. We have to buy that stuff before we can do the other thing. Do we have the money to buy that stuff? Oh, shit, don’t forget about the other other thing we have to do. I went to that place to buy that thing yesterday, but they were sold out, so one of us is going to have to go back.”

Fun fun fun. 

Cristian’s workload is always quite high. His schedule is demanding and inflexible.  It ramps up into an overdrive mode every semester, at the end of the semester. It’s the end of the semester, we’re moving, and Cristian is working until 8 several nights every week.

Neither one of us scheduled any time off work, because this was a “local” move and we have a month, so how hard could it be?

Be ye not so foolish. Moving without taking time off work is stupid, and bad for your personality. 

This morning, Cristian was driving my car with me in it towards his work, while I tried to stuff my craw with enough food to tide me over until lunch. We were about 95% of the way there when out from under the car came a nightmarish, horrifying, heart-rending noise. It sounded like a 20 pound barbell bouncing off the road, against the underbelly of the car, over and over and over again. A smashing, grinding, metallic collision.

“JESUS FUCKING CHRIST!” I yelled.  “WHAT DID YOU JUST DO TO MY CAR?!”

“I THOUGHT IT WAS A CUP! I THOUGHT IT WAS A CUP!” Cristian yelled back.

Many hours later, with the car seemingly intact, this strikes me as fucking hilarious.

This too shall pass, right?

(I think it was a plumber’s wrench.)

November 19, 2007

First the dentist, now this

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 9:28 am

I thought you all might like to you that I’m done with my Christmas shopping for the year.  Completely, 100% done.

That is all. 

November 16, 2007

The Journey

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 1:53 pm

Rather than read my blather, I suggest you head on over to The Journey today to read Kyla’s succinct breakdown of how the American health care system is failing her family. I heard stories like hers every single day of my direct work with cancer patients. The system, it is broken.

November 15, 2007

My Milkshake, I mean Dentist, Brings All The Boys To The Yard, I Mean Dentist’s Office

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 4:36 pm

Come here, you. Sit down here, right next to me. Cuddle up close, don’t be shy. Give me your hand. What I’m about to say, it’s not going to be easy for you to hear, and I don’t want there to be any hard feelings between us.

My dentist’s chairs all have built in electrical massagers that you control with your own personal remote. Also flat screen tvs over all the chairs that work off the same magical remote. My dental hygienist and I took a break during my cleaning today to watch a cooking demonstration on the Food Network.  There’s free WiFi in the waiting room. Also, after the cleaning was done, the billing lady made me a free double latte. Their whole practice is built around babying people like me, grown adults who are deeply, profoundly afraid of the dentist, not unlike the fear a rabbit has of a rabid dog. 

Wait! Wait! Don’t pull away like that. I was surprised too.  I understand. You’re  resentful, and jealous. Who do I think I am, Princess Diana? I mean, I’m a pretty conscientious recycler, but so what? So are you! I can’t even spell conscientious without help from Spell Check. If anything I should use my time in the dentist’s chair as an opportunity to work on basic elementary educational skills, not getting massages and lattes.  I mean, really.

November 13, 2007

Infinity Within

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 1:52 pm

So I’m about to go get my hair cut at this new place. I have this problem, this deeply personal problem, where I’ll go and get one or two really GREAT haircuts out of a stylist, and I’ll think I’ve done it, I’ve finally broken the bad hair barrier for the last time HALLELUJAH…..then haircut #3 will not be so good, and not only that but the conversation was bad, and that’s just awkward, and then #s 4 and 5 are also not so good and the conversation only gets worse, and by haircut #6 I am looking at the haircuts of women around me, and wondering where they go to get their hair done, and the next thing you know I have a new salon and a new stylist that I just love love love love, until haircut #3 sets me back behind the bad hair barrier YET AGAIN.

 Also? I had a bob for about 4 years? And then? Six months after I decided to grow it out? It became the new big haircut. Which I am actually relieved about, because if people thought I used Victoria Beckham for my personal fashion inspiration, I would have to kill myself.  

So, new salon! Look at what they’re promising me:

At the root of Aveda’s New Salon’s holistic spa philosophy are the five elements found in nature (and within each of us): Infinity, Air, Fire,Water and Earth. Before each service, we ask our guests to complete an Elemental NatureSM Questionnaire which allows our therapists to create personalized treatments and self-care rituals based on your Elemental NatureSM.

I’m not just going to get my hair cut, I’m going to learn about my Elemental Nature AND a therapist is going to create a Self-Care Ritual for me! I hope it includes ice cream.

P.S.  I had NO IDEA I had infinity within me. That seems so impossible. I guess I should start trying harder!

November 11, 2007

Deep in the Heart

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 9:32 am

Cristian (looking at the cover of Texas Monthly): It’s so weird how most Texans vacation in Texas.

Dana: Well, yeah. Texas is big.

Cristian: Still though………….

Dana: Cristian. If you left Boston and drove straight West for 12 hours, where would you be?

Cristian: Ohio?

Dana: In Texas, you would still be in Texas.

Cristian: Really? 12 hours?

Dana: Texarkana to El Paso. 12 hours.

Cristian: Jesus Christ. It’s like living in a black hole.

Dana: It’s a lone star, Cristian.

November 9, 2007

It Happened (to me)

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 10:41 am

Me: So I fell down the airport escalator and now I have this crazy bruise.

Suzanne: Oh god! What happened?

Me: I was distracted by the security guys at the bottom of the escalator (I had never been double screened like that before), so I was looking at them, and I forgot to look and make sure that I stepped completely on one step of the escalator. I stepped right in the middle of where two stairs come apart.
  So then as the stairs came apart, I fell backwards
  and landed on my ass on the metal area just in front of where the escalator starts
  while my bag went up without me. The airport people didn’t like that, the unescorted bag.
 and my legs got pummeled by the rising stairs still going up, b/c the escalator doesn’t stop just because someone falls off.
  Hence the leg bruise.
  Strangers gasped
  Security dude came over
  I had to inch my butt backwards a few times before I could stand up
  My backpack was on the whole time, which really made me feel about 4 years old.
  Moral of the story: ALWAYS CHECK AND MAKE SURE YOU’RE NOT STANDING ON THE CRACK BETWEEN TWO ESCALATOR STAIRS. ALL IT TAKES IS ONE TIME BEING CARELESS, AND YOU’RE DOWN.

Suzanne: oh my god
  i love that story
  you should blog about it

Me: I will, I was going to put it in the mildly scary list, but then I decided to save it.
  I actually said, “WOOOOAH!” out loud, as I fell.

Suzanne: that’s the best part
  well that and how you were still wearing your backpack

Me: Like an oversized idiot toddler. The worst part was, I had to wait in the security line with all the people who saw me fall. We all knew it had happened, but we all had to pretend everything was normal. It was pretty awkward. The right thing to do after a fall like that is to run away and hide.
Suzanne: oh man…i cannot imagine how hilarious that looked….if we had been with you we probably would still be laughing

Me: It was just a straightback, flat on the ass didn’t-see-it-coming tumble. With a nice loud WOAH to draw attention.   These things happen.   (to me)

Suzanne: haha, and i get to experience them through you

November 7, 2007

Things That Happened in LA That Were Mildly Scary

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 4:11 pm
  1. I rode my bike up the side of a mountain.
  2. I rode my bike down the side of a mountain.
  3. I rode my bike on a sandy beach.
  4. I rode my bike in the slippery ocean. (For only two feet. But still! Ocean! Bike! Riding!)
  5. Post-race, I hung out in a hot tub to relax, only to accidentally invite a chatty homeless woman to join me.
  6. I became so dependent on my in-car GPS system that I used it to find a Starbucks that was literally across the street from my hotel.

November 6, 2007

Photographic Evidence

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 4:09 pm

loadexperiencemedia.jpg

November 5, 2007

Muddy

Filed under: Uncategorized — dregina @ 4:02 pm

PEOPLE, THE RACE WENT RIGHT UP THE SIDE OF A MOUNTAIN.

This was very unexpected. 

(We still finished.)

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